Heated Rivalry, a rant
- Aberforth Wall
- Jan 31
- 15 min read
I’d like to talk about the narrative around Heated Rivalry, which pertains to a few different subjects. So I’ll give a quick recap, not that you need it, of the show. I’ll discuss my feelings about it and some other recent queer content. I’ll also get into the conversation around the show… particularly how we discuss women and women in fandom. So if you’re not interested in that, now is the time to bounce!
Sidebar: I usually do more research heavy video essays - this is more my opinion. Totally valid to feel differently. I just wanted to info dump… for the catharsis.
Heated Rivalry is a 2025 six-episode Canadian series.
It’s based on a novel by the same name, the second in Rachel Reid’s Game Changers series.
Game Changers (2018)
Heated Rivalry (2019)
Tough Guy (2020)
Common Goal (2020)
Role Model (2021)
The Long Game (2022)
Unrivaled (2026)
The series is directed by Jacob Tierney for the Canadian streaming service Crave.
It was picked up for American distribution by HBO (Max? I don’t know what it’s called anymore I can’t keep up).
When I looked it up, IMDb has it on 9/10 and Rotten Tomatoes has it at 97%.
Quick recap: I did my best. I’m not confident.
Heated Rivalry starts in December 2008 with teenaged hockey players Shane Hollander and Ilya Rosanov beginning the International Prospect Cup - from my minimal understanding of sports they are like THE star performers.
They are kind of flirty with one another and sending signals. From their first introduction to the first time they meet up - post shower scene - it’s about a year and a half.
2008, Dec: 17: Meeting at International Prospect Cup
2009, June: Gym session
2010, June: the commercial shoot, shower scene, and first time…
2011, Jan: 19: All Star Game + press conference + second time.
2011, May: Rookie of the year = Vegas argument
The show makes a LOT of time jumps! Whenever Shane and Ilya meet each other over the years they continue to be flirty and hook up.
2011 - 2013: flirty texts
2013, fall: Montreal hookup
2014, Winter: Sochi Olympics
2014, May: Vegas awards - bathroom, didn’t even kiss…
2014-2016: meeting up…
A major sidestory is devoted to another hockey player Scott Hunter and his relationship with the smoothie maker and grad school prospect with the best TV dad I’ve ever seen, Kip. Apparently Kip is a sobriquet for Christopher? Huh. Anyway.
Also he’s not a barista… if you say you’re a barista and give me anything other than coffee we will be having words!
The entire third episode diverges from Shane and Ilya and is dedicated to Scott and Kip, which from my understanding is the focus of the first book: Game Changers.
As viewers we go from watching these two young hockey players having a slow burn, tense, sexual, passionate, relationship. To watching two men who are a bit older, having a beautiful, slower, romance with fantastic open communication.
Then, we cut back to Shane and Ilya for episodes 4-6.
Slowly Shane and Ilya’s relationship is growing and more importantly deepening. Ilya particularly starts to express (albeit with hints) that he’s invested in the relationship, but that freaks Shane out at first. He still isn’t ready for that.
2016, Oct: 25: Ilya has tuna melt and Ginger Ale, calls Shane by his first time. Shane freaks out and starts dating Rose Landry.
2017, ?: All Star Game - they’re on the same team in Tampa. They’re in the same place on the same team officially.
Ilya’s dad dies. Russian monologue
Shane is injured in the game…
It’s a kind of push-pull situation. Ilya uses Shane’s first time. Shane starts a relationship with Rose. Ilya loses his father and wants more with Shane. Shane comes to terms with being gay and wants Ilya more. Ilya sees Shane get hurt and backs off. Two steps forward, every step back.
At the end of the fifth episode: after winning The Cup, Scott Hunter calls Kip out onto the ice and kisses him publicly. This is the representation and open expression of love that Ilya and Shane needed to see. Ilya gets the courage to call Shane and tells him he’s coming to the cottage.
The show culminates in May 2017 when Ilya stays at Shane’s cottage and they are finally able to express that they love one another and plan a future together. By this point it’s been eight and a half years, they are in their mid-twenties (age 17-25? Is my guess).
2017, Summer: cottage! They confess their love and Shane plans their future. Shane also comes out to his parents.
The show ends with Shane coming out to his parents and being accepted.
OK so some things I’ve heard on the social medias and I just wanted to comment on: Again… all opinions here. Some bias about me: I’m a Sapphic person. Additionally, I don’t really like romance stories, I mostly engage in horror. So, I’m coming at this from a weird perspective.
First! I’m only going to make this nitpick because it’s relevant: the show really isn’t depicting the enemies-to-lovers trope. They are, as the title indicates, rivals. They’re in competition with one another. But, they’ve always liked and respected one another. Enemies-to-lovers (to me) requires one or both parties having disdain for one another. The competition aspect is something I’ll bring up later - but that’s important.
Next… queers in isolation. Watching episode three I was a bit disappointed in how Scott Hunter was depicted in total isolation. No one knows he’s gay. He has no friends outside his job. No family. Nothing. In media gay and trans people are often depicted alone. As it pertains to Scott Hunter’s specific situation we know from accounts a lot of gay actors back in the Golden Era of Hollywood had community - they weren’t out publicly but they were out to their circle. I don’t know about athletes, did I mention I know nothing about sports? Probably should have mentioned that before. But I think it’s unhealthy to continuously perpetuate this idea that when someone is in the closet that NO ONE knows. A lot of queer people are out to some, and not to others. It’s called the Queer Community… it’s a community.
However, the show kind of escapes that with Shane by having him come out to his parents. This is exactly what I’m talking out with celebrities, they might not be out publicly, but privately they often are. That is SUCH better representation to me because most media won’t depict it like that. I think people need to see queer people and allies celebrating each other even when the outside world isn’t.
On Scott Hunter and Kip! I loved them! In a single episode and plus the epilogue of another, they depicted one of the most beautiful relationships I’ve ever seen. I’m surprised I haven’t heard other people talk about the age difference between Scott/Kip vs Shane/Ilya. The first two episodes that are kinda more sexual and hot + heavy are when Shane and Ilya are in their late teens-early twenties. The shift post episode three when their relationship slows down and emotionally deeps, it’s when they’re in their mid-twenties. I think that shift from slut-era to emotionally impactful is common.
Scott and Kip are older. I think Kip’s twenty-six, but he’s definitely emotionally more mature. Scott’s for sure in his thirties. The relationship between two men who are late-twenties to thirties compared to two men who are college aged… is different. How you love, how you express love, your emotional maturity, what you expect in a relationship and how you navigate a relationship should change and evolve as you grow older - even if you’re with the same person.
As someone in their mid-thirties I enjoyed watching Scott and Kip so much more than Shane and Ilya. I was SO MUCH more engaged with the Scott/Kip relationship - because that’s more where I am in life and that’s more what I think is a good relationship and find romantic.
Lastly on this I want to note the different support systems we see the main characters have. Kip obviously has the best TV Dad. He’s loved and very well adjusted. Scott lost his parents and views his team as his family… though apparently not one of them adopted him into their family like Hayden -.-. Ok. Shane has both parents and seems like a default family, though he does have some pressure on him. And Ilya… yikes. Lost him mom, his Dad seems harsh then has a slow decline due to dementia and his brother simply sucks. The person he’s closest to is Svetlana… and he seems close to his team too. Those differences impact who the characters are and how they express love.
OH I had one more comparison to make. There is another huge difference between the Scott/Kip romance compared to the Shane/Ilya romance. Kip isn’t a hockey player. Shane and Ilya both are. That is a big freaking difference! Like if two lawyers are married they usually are not going to represent opposing parties. There is a conflict there, which might come up in later books idk. Regardless. It would make sense that even if they were out that they kept their relationship to themselves due to the conflict within their careers. Co-workers dating each other often keep that on the DL.
I’ve seen people commenting on two real life athletes in the women’s professional hockey league… I’m just going to say I don’t feel comfortable looking into people’s real lives. That’s not a substitute for queer representation in TV. If they write a biography about their experiences I’ll happily read that - otherwise I’m minding my business.
At this point I want to retroactively explain why I watched Heated Rivalry.
Again Sapphic. I don’t really like any kind of sex scene on screen. I can totally do without. Not saying they shouldn’t be there - just that I don’t like them. Further, I don’t like generally romance… However, I will often put on queer content and just let it play, to give it the views - easy way to support queer content. But this show is good - I’ll circle back around to that point.
Typically romance shows/films depict heteronormative couples with an icky power dynamic and portraying toxic traits that actively make me root against them getting together. Like NO GIRL leave him, actually, run from him and his red flags!
What I really appreciated about Heated Rivalry is they did what I call the Roddenberry maneuver! Gene Roddenberry is the creator of Star Trek: TOS. I love TOS. Something interesting he did that love is he decided the tension (read drama) should arise from outside sources, not in-fighting within the crew of the Enterprise. Heated Rivalry does the same thing. The issues the two couples we see don’t really come from within (so they’re not interpersonal) - they arise from outside circumstances - particularly Scott and Kip’s. Shane and Ilya also have to deal with being young, while that is interpersonal it’s not an issue within the relationship, they always treated each other well and respectfully. Because of this, I can actively root for the couples to get together. That’s rare.
[Well also Shane not ever taking the time to Google how Russia treats queer men… seems like that could have resolved a lot of problems. Ilya could have also explained why he was frequently upset - but how he works through things is very physical. So, I guess there is a mismatch on communication style.]
Anyway that brings me back to competition and by extent power dynamics!
We about to side tangent like it’s episode three!
The conversation around this show often comes to ‘why do straight women watch Heated Rivalry’ and laughing and criticizing women for watching or the show for being watched by straight women - when it’s a show about gay men.
Ok… a lot to unpack there.
Regardless of who the show is about - in this case gay men - shows want to be watched by everyone. Viewership numbers matter. Sadly, if a show is about a more niche demographic it tends to mean less viewers. Heated Rivalry is simply put, a well written, phenomenally acted, show with a great sound track, lighting, cinematography, editing, pacing… you name it - Heated Rivalry excelled at it. Anyone can watch this show and appreciate it if not outright enjoy watching it. Many love it.
Why, specifically, straight women…
From an outside perspective… here’s my two cents: (with inflation I think it’s $.31. geez)
1) women who find men attractive - from my experience of fandom - will love a show with attractive men in it. Supernatural didn’t get 15 seasons for nothing.
A lot of women like sex. And they’re allowed to like sex and be attracted to someone. I’ve never heard a man be criticized for being turned on by sapphic content… (read porn). Men aren’t asked to defend that. They aren’t judged or laughed at. Men fetishizing or sexualizing women in any circumstance is typically considered normal. When it happens the other way, clearly people find that jarring. Newsflash… the population would be WAY lower if women didn’t like sex.
2) girls are taught to want romance. Romance content is clearly marketed towards women. Girls see in media that their ‘happily ever after’ is winding up in a relationship. For reference see Barbie as a rejection of that narrative. There is a long history of oppression that feeds into that. Women had so many restrictions on them, their only options and societally viewed purpose/value was to get married and have babies. Watching content about gay men avoids that narrative and oppression.
3) in fact! Content about two men in a relationship rather than a man and woman avoids a lot of pitfalls heteronormative romances tend to fall into. As noted I am usually rooting against them. I often find myself saying or asking: what’s with the age gap? Oh he makes a lot more than her. Am I supposed to like him, because he’s a red flag. This is manipulative. This is toxic. He is psychotic! No woman acts like this! Oh and the sexualization… And omg we’d be here all day if I got on Hallmark movies…
I’ll get back s*x of it all later.
Stories - books, tv, movies - historically have been written/made by men, about men, from men’s perspectives. So women are subservient (word choice very intended) to men’s stories. In genres outside romance – women usually fulfil the role of eyecandy. For reference see Mulvey’s ‘Visual Pleasure and Narrative Cinema’. And, if not that then they are background characters who are cheerleaders and emotional support for men and men’s stories.
Which… Heated Rivalry does engage in that. The women are just there to root for the men (Rose, Svetlana, Kip’s two friends). I guess at least they are depicted positively - they feel like real women which is head and shoulders above too many shows/movies. It’s just kind of sad that in 2026 this is not only one of the best shows in terms of queer representation but also female representation. It’s 2026 and we’re only this far. That’s not a knock on the show at all… it’s a critique of North American society… woe.
Just looking at how people are discussing women enjoying this show reminds me: society still devalues things women like, things perceived as feminine (like romance). And I realize they aren’t just devalued and laughed at… they are often also infantilized. I think that’s why people are so thrown that women like a show with sex and so openly talk about sex. It’s kind of part of purity culture.
Let's talk about fetish… are straight women fetishizing gay men/romance?
Short answer is: some totally are, many definitely are not.
There is a subtle but important difference between fetishizing and sexualizing.
Fetishizing is sexualizing with a component of not just objectification but dehumanization. I would describe men watching sapphic adult films as fetishizing. Whereas women reading a romance book with sex scenes is sexualizing them. Specifically sexualizing them as a component not of fetish but of romanticizing them. They still consider them not only as people but characters with agency.
And not to get into the socio-historical context again but there is a difference between men sexualizing women and women sexualizing men. Men have not faced the oppression or violence against them that women have (as a whole). I personally don’t like that it happens either way - I find it cringy at best. However, that’s fully my opinion.
We move on.
Why do women write these books?
I’ve already mentioned the reasons why so lets tie them back. Stories - books, tv, movies - historically have been written/made by men, about men, from men’s perspectives. Women are only as of these past few years getting published at equal rates… but that doesn’t mean they’re being more read. More importantly, what you read while you’re young influences how you write. Most school required books are written by men. Further, it’s not uncommon for books written by women have a main male character - see Harry Potter.
We’re all taught to read from the male perspective. So… I would hazard a guess it’s easier to write from that perspective.
[A lot of female characters lack authenticity because they are created by men. Sometimes they even feel like they’re reduced to outright make fantasies of what women are like or negative stereotypes. I think I liked Heated Rivalry because it kind of inverts that. It’s male characters are created by a woman. They feel like what many women wish men were like: open, vulnerable, communicative… ya know, tolerable.]
Oh and the commercialization aspect. Males are privileged in almost every aspect in life, that certainly includes as an audience. I’ve heard so often in movies and TV that show runners or directors are asked by studios to put things in for boys/men. Women have always been asked to put themselves in the male perspective - the empathize and sympathize with them and their stories and issues, ect. To that I say boo! Anyway, men and boys are rarely ever asked to do the same for girls/women’s stories. Worse they are typically criticized if they do.
So, if you want your book to do well… it is in your best interest to make the main character male.
Also there is an aspect of sexual repression here… maybe?
This gets a bit deeper than I want to go. But… hey, adults like sex. And, that’s ok actually. Hearing the way some people are talking about this show just highlighted how sexually repressed US and Canadians are. Like, are we ok?
Seeing a show with two young men that are having just normal sex is getting people this hot and bothered… this is smut? This is spicy? It’s two twenty something year old men having sex that maybe two steps above vanilla. Ok. Do I have ao3 brainrot? Was my college slut-era that crazy? I don’t know. This just seems sad to me.
Anyway!
I have one last thing to comment on: other queer content. Note: I can only talk about what I’ve personally seen.
Something that bothered me was hearing people erase other shows in order to build Heated Rivalry up. That’s simply not necessary. OK I understand they might not have heard of these but I have and it made me sad!
What I did appreciate is that Heated Rivalry is a queer show that’s… happy and sexy.
Conversely:
Fellow Travelers is sexy and sad.
Interview with the Vampire is sexy and dramatic.
Heartstopped is sweet and so damn enduring.
Love, Victor is very teen angst.
Our Flag Means Death… camp af but also very romantic.
Too much content about gay men is tragic. So having a sweeter romance is refreshing.
Then going back to sex for a moment. That gets a little complex. In live action media! same sex female relationships tend to get overly sexualized (not always - shout out to Willow and Tara). Meanwhile, gay men in media can be treated SO differently. A lot of time we see a single gay man or like in Modern Family where they like barely even kiss.
I mentioned it above but there is a different socio-historical context - so it’s a little different. I’m very much for de-emphasizing the sexualizing of women, especially sapphic relationships. With that being said… that should not come to the extreme end of totally erasing sex from adult women’s relationships. That goes for male queer relationships too.
But… Historically, the sex has been so over-emphasized in regards to conversations about the queer community. Consider the pathologized term homo*sexual* and the anti-queer arguments that typically frame queer people as being sexually perverse.
It’s important to show queer people as human beings. And, it’s understandable to be hesitant about how physical intimacy is shown between same sex relationships. The right answer isn’t to erase it… or fetishize it. There’s a healthy in between. Somewhere. I think Heated Rivalry is a good middle…
I really can’t get over how sexually repressed women in North America are. It’s wild. I’m so sorry for us all. Anyway!
I heard people asking: where is the lesbian Heated Rivalry? First someone wanting sapphic representation in television and getting a book rec is diabolical. Don’t do that, or ask first at least. Damn.
The closest I can think of is A League of Their Own which has one season and was set in the world of female baseball in the 1940s. A lot of lesbian shows only get one season, also many are animated. Men are more represented in live action. I think that plays into the infantilization of women and femininity. But gay men are more often shown single, while women will be in relationships.
I can’t think of a single show devoid of an avid female audience that is successful. A show centering on two women will not get the love, attention, and devotion of the straight female audience that shows focusing on gay men will. Sadly, men - gay, straight, or otherwise, often don’t show up for lesbians either. Which sucks.
I don’t want to be mean but straight women who only show up for gay men are not allies. If you don’t show up for lesbians, and transpeople that person is not an ally. At that point I would distinguish their viewership of Heated Rivalry as fetishizing (rather than sexualizing) because they are just viewing that character as an object to get off on. Which is disappointing.
Heated Rivalry to me shows that a well made show will do well and gain word of mouth and get high viewership… that’s what I want it to mean.
It does make me sad that in 2026 this is as far as we’ve gotten in terms of queer rep. And sadly it is highlighting for me, by the narrative surrounding it, how misogynist our culture still is. So that’s a bummer.
It’s a great show though and I hope it shows other studios that there is an audience for this and that makes baby steps towards progress…
Anyway that concludes this horror nerd’s rant about the queer romance show. Hope it was at least fun to listen to on this after what might have been the longest January on record.
Alright! if you’ll excuse me, I have some oozing to do. Stay with the rainbows!
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